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Spiritualism is a movement based on the belief that the spirits of the dead exist and have the ability and the necessary means to communicate with the living. The afterlife, or the “spirit world”, is seen by spiritualists, not as a static place, but as one in which spirits continue to evolve.


Is spiritualism the same as religion?

There are some pretty clear ways in which religion and spirituality differ. Religion: This is a specific set of organised beliefs and practices, usually shared by a community or group. Spirituality: This is more of an individual practice, and has to do with having a sense of peace and purpose.

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What do New Spiritualists believe?

Because consciousness can be found in everything, New Spiritualists believe in collective consciousness. The book defines this term as the belief that everything is ultimately energy and that everyone possesses the potential to achieve divine unity with the cosmos.


Mr. Chopra has some great stuff out there, including this article about finding your TRUE SELF. I love this man for giving his guidance.

“…Everyone possesses the potential to achieve divine unity with the cosmos.”


My mind became much like Swiss cheese in 2020. I still think it’s quite like that, but I’m struggling to find myself in this mess. The mess Psycho Boy Ben left me with. It was his house, full of black mold, that nearly destroyed me utterly. I tried to tell him it was an issue, but he blew me off. He did that all the time. He always blew off everything I had to say, convincing me, ultimately, that my viewpoint and reality was beyond worthless.

He treated me like a blow-up doll rather than a human being.

My soul fractured and shattered into a million pieces, thanks to him and everything he did (or didn’t do.) He didn’t reassure me and make me feel desirable. He didn’t take me seriously. He didn’t even like me — that’s what I believe now, given all the facts. I don’t even know why we were ever together.

I was bound to him through multiple traumas, sadly. I knew I had to leave, especially when he confessed to me that he pulled down his sister’s underwear when she was young and asleep on the couch. He told me he thought she was trying to bring it up with him — which most likely means she was bringing it up with him and he didn’t want to deal with it. At first, I gave him the worst advice — just ignore it. I realized later that’s his status quo and also I realized that the ignorance of my own rapists was damaging me, so I reversed my advice within a week or so, telling him he ought to apologize to her for that event. Did he? Not that he ever told me, anyway. You’d think he’d tell me if he did.

That was more than three years ago. I applaud Rachel’s chutzpah, her ability to dive in head-first in a difficult conversation, especially with the psychopath she calls brother. From this, I extrapolated he probably raped all three of his sisters in their childhood, if not beyond. Something nags me about the Carmen thing, telling me that she’s the product of Ben raping his youngest sister.

I hope I’m wrong, but given that he’d rape his own mother if he was given the chance, I’m not going to hold my breath for any other answer.

He’s vile, in a word. I’m pretty sure he wants to take me to court over our vacation club package in order to exert control over me. Just like he has pictures of me (and him, of course) in intimate situations. I deleted all mine, but what did he do? Make me a read-only user on the folder I populated with pictures. That tore me up for a little while, until I resolved to simply delete my association with the account altogether. I, ultimately, have the control here: I don’t have to view it and be eaten alive about it. If he shows anyone, that is against his character; he will be perceived as weak. Manipulative. A bastard, in a word.

He is a bastard, that I assure you of.

That woman is no longer me. I was sixty five pounds heavier, for one thing… but even if I wasn’t, she’s still not me. She’s a woman I used to be. I’ll never be her again. I thought it was safe to be the real me, and now I understand there is no such thing as safety when it comes to trusting another human being. Not to mention that wasn’t even the real me: that was rape victim Crystal.

You might say I’m damaged, but I posit I’ve always been damaged.

God did me a real favor and I’ll tell you how. I have had abandonment issues my entire life, thanks to my parents mistreating me completely. I had a deep-seated grief inside my soul for as long as I could remember. In fact, he said I was programmed to find narcissistic assholes, which I agree with now, looking back at my entire life. I was homing in on them, sadly.

God stitched up that grief. He took me from being an open empath and made me much more normal. He had to for the spiritual battle I’m fighting presently. I enjoyed having great empathy for all creatures on Earth. Now that’s all creatures but human beings. I hate them. I don’t want to see them ever again, even though my very existence depends on them. (Did we mention I’m rather suicidal? We did? Splendid.)

And yet, I go to the grocery store, and something in me scans for that guy. I even try to make it stop, but it never does. I hate that part of me. I am pretty sure it’s one of the gay men fighting over me in my head. The man is handsome, I admit it; in fact, they obsess over his broad shoulders. I’m nonplussed, myself.

I have no opinion to speak of… and it’s not because I have a different opinion. I actually have no opinion because I happen to know all men are handsome and all women are beautiful. Or, if you’re like me and like simplicity, all humans are beautiful. And if you want to get even simpler: everything is beautiful.

But men don’t seem to like being called beautiful. I don’t know why not. The meaning of beautiful, according to the Oxford dictionary, is “pleasing the senses or mind aesthetically./of a very high standard; excellent.”

I don’t see any indicator that it’s a word only for females, do you? Well then, get over it, bitches! YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL!

These men who would fornicate with me, they’re stuck in the back of my mind. And, because I’m psychic and sensitive to psychic information, I continue to act on their impulses. I am ashamed of this because I prefer to be the captain of my own ship, thankyouverymuch. They constantly attempt to sabotage me.

It’s really hard to sabotage someone who is in contact with the divine. I am one with the universe. I bet you heard that cheesy pickup line before, Universe(TM)! I mean it, unlike some others who claim it. (Many people mean it and they are actually one with The Universe(TM). We can all achieve that if we want to. He tells me my first step was starving myself to death, so hop to it already.)

(Oh, you don’t want to starve to death? I didn’t, either, but you know… now, after 15 months of therapy — physical and emotional — it’s not so bad. It’s getting better all the time. In fact, he tells me soon I can have a job. I wish I wanted a job, truth be told, but right now I’m too tired all the time.)

(Did you forget I’m fighting cancer? Me, too.)

I’m taking an excellent meditation course through Udemy. It’s free, to boot. I’d tell you which one, but they’re all worth taking, honestly. Pick the one that speaks to you and back out of it if it’s not for you. Easy peasy. We love Udemy, God and I. There’s a ton of free learning to be had on there, plus we’ve been learning several new kinds of reiki on there.

We did it mostly for the attunements from the healers who wrote the courses. (Thank you, reiki healers.)

I understand why people think reiki is bogus now, though. Most people don’t know how to open up to Source to get started. I’m going to put a reiki course on there. I imagine it’ll be free. I’ll certify anyone who can heal me. It’s not hard after you figure out how to connect to Source, but most people don’t know how to do it yet. Don’t worry, I know how to teach you.

They say coffee makes you unable to channel. Being pH balanced is really important. I don’t find that to be true for myself. It makes me stronger to be alkaline, but it’s not even close to necessary. Your body heals itself better in the alkaline state, honestly; that is absolutely true.

Do you know how difficult it is to eat alkaline with two stupid white rapist men in my head? Two men obsessed with hot dogs, hot dog buns, bacon, burgers, and so on? What is it with you cheese heads? You are poisoning yourselves. It’ll express in your 60s (or earlier) as high blood pressure, astronomically high bad cholesterol numbers, gall bladder problems, and much, much more. You’re killing yourself with every bite, bro.

And ladies? This is where all your unwanted globs of fat come from. Stop eating dairy. Stop eating nightshades. Stop eating processed meats. Get yourself a hunk o’ meat on the bone, if you can, and slow cook it so it falls apart. The leaner, the better — just add plant fats to make sure it’s tender and delightful. We prefer avocado oil right now, but that’s because we’re allergic to everything. (And fighting cancer while allergic to everything.)

Ain’t that a shit show. I assure you, it doth sucketh.

I also advise we give up gluten. And alcohol. Embrace the cannabis instead. It’s a plant that doesn’t need to be fermented. Fermentation is bad, mmkay? (That means vinegar is bad, too.) That alcohol you ingest? It’s killing all the bacteria in your gut. Then you chase it with this shitty food that is full of bad juju and you repopulate the gut with bad juju and the next day you wonder why you have a hangover. IT’S THE BACTERIAL OVERKILL.

Then you get all blah because you ate food that’s bad for you, you keep eating it because that’s what your gut desires and craves, especially that candida overgrowth that absolutely loves dairy + gluten + sugar. And alcohol, because it’s made from sugar.

By the way, ever check the ingredients of your bread? Isn’t it a bit sus, all that sugar in there? You only need a teaspoon to feed the yeast in a loaf of bread. (In fact, you can get away with NONE because GLUTEN IS SUGAR.)

Yeast. You know… candida is a type of yeast. Ever think about that?

Me, neither, until I was dying from absolutely everything.

You can starve it and then your cravings will die forever. I have zero cravings 99% of the time, until I eat something with yeast or potato. I no longer eat those things if I can avoid it. You can starve it without starving your body, too – that is the most important thing. You just have to add more fat.

<glass shatters> <gasps are heard> BUT FAT! IT’S THE DEVIL! THE HEALTH INDUSTRY TOLD ME SO!

Nay, nay! I’m here to tell you a new narrative, one that will keep you from being a crankysaurus rex when you get hangry. PLANT FAT IS YOUR FRIEND. Nut fats should be ingested in the form of EATING NUTS, so steer away from those. If you’re not allergic, grab coconut oil, avocado oil, canola oil, and, if you can find a pure enough one, olive oil. Virgin, extra virgin, expeller pressed, filtered… doesn’t matter as long as the source is organic. Meat fat is your ENEMY.

Once you stop eating all this crap, the cravings die. Your belly will get flatter and flatter. YOU WILL NEVER BE HUNGRY. The point of this diet is to get at least 2000 calories a day, 33% of which from plant fats. That’s 5.5 tablespoons of olive oil, by the way. The rest should be lean meat and produce, leaning toward… No, stop it. Leafy greens SUCK. Leaning towards brassicas.

What’s a brassica, Crystal?

“A member of the family of vegetables that includes broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, cauliflower, collard greens, kale, and turnips. These vegetables contain substances that may protect against cancer. Also called cruciferous vegetable.”

Don’t force yourself to eat shit you hate, by the way. Just find the ones you love and eat them. Organic is best, but some of us can’t afford that shit yet. Once we all try to eat organic, that’ll come down in price. (2-3 years, my friends… in the meantime, you can garden for yourself organically. Seeds cost as little as 99 cents.)

Eat lots of nuts, too, if you can. Sunflower seed butter. Soy. These are great sources of plant protein. To kick cancer, you need plenty of protein (plant & animal), B vitamins (brassicas + moderate sized ripe & uncooked fruits), and minerals (drink spring water, my friends.)

You’ll find some recipes throughout this blog that might inspire you (or might just suit the fact that you give zero fucks today but you wanna feel better and you’ll try anything) that will help you fight cancer. I eat almost 50% fat right now, actually, considering I eat liberal amounts of avocado oil + nuts + sunbutter + not-so-lean meat drained of fat once it is prepared. I’m eating up to 2 pounds of meat a day, depending on the day. I’m taking in BONE BROTH and LIQUID AMINOS by Bragg (available at Wegmans.) I also put collagen in my coffee (which I drink copious amounts of with soy milk) and I drink about a gallon of spring water a day, sometimes almost two gallons (including my coffee habit, mind you.)

Hell, I add avo oil to a handful of nuts from time to time, then I add some granulated garlic and onion seasoning. Put in a pinch of basil and parsley and you might even think of Italian comfort food as you chow down. (Also good on top of kale or leafy greens – but I hate leafy greens for the most part and I’m so sick of being advised to eat them. Oh spinach is soooooo good for you. I’m allergic, you “health food” brats!)

Just because a food has good nutrients in it doesn’t mean your body can get those nutrients out of it. Bananas are healthy, right? I gain 2 pounds just eating one, no matter how ripe it is. That’s ABNORMAL. I bet your body does the same thing if you’re not heavily South American in genetics. STOP EATING BANANAS. They’re going extinct anyway from our stupidity, so just stop. Save the rainforest!


God told me today that bees are his absolute favorite Earth species. They’re on the endangered list. Did you know that? They got reclassified with fish just so somebody would take them seriously, but I find it less credible that way. (Sorry, scientists. You lost me at fish.)


Anything! AND STOP USING PESTICIDES. STOP KILLING EVERYTHING YELLOW AND BLACK WITH WINGS OUT OF FUCKING FEAR. You are inadvertently inviting disaster, because what will come to replace the bees is much nastier than a bee, I promise you that, Earthlings.

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