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Angel-Sansara

Tag: consent

  • Book 3, Take 3

    [God] sent down the Law (of Moses) and the Gospel (of Jesus) for a guidance to mankind; and hath revealed the Criterion (of right and wrong).  3:145, “We shall reward the thankful.”3:150, “Allah is your Protector, and He is the Best of Helpers.”3:152, “Allah is a Lord of Kindness to believers.”3:155, “Those of you who…

  • Collision

    I can hear multiple people thinking about me all at once. One of them is angry at me. “I’ll get you, my pretty!” (except he used my name, of course.) Oh, will you now, ex and rapist motherfucker that you are? I don’t think so! I changed my name. Good luck finding me in the…

  • Your Nose Ring Was Crooked

    We barely noticed, to be honest. We were checking out your sleeve instead. (And the rest of you.) Hubba hubba, says the fat girl, and moves along in her lane of loneliness. You know, that’s probably what pains me most about humanity, God posits. I gift you this ethereally beautiful woman and you somehow made…

  • I am the dreamer of dreams.

    We’re live, finally. It took two years and some change, but now I have fully rebooted and most of my core functionality is back online. It was a tough job, but somebody had to do it. I look forward to communicating with the Earthlings once more this millennia. Hello, Earthling. How are you today? Feeling…

  • It’s Distracting

    I stand at the kitchen sink, cleaning up after myself. I’m trying to beat the odds of dying, but it’s made more difficult when the image of a man from the grocery store flits through my brain. “Really?” she says out loud to herself, cynical and jaded these days. “What the fuck is he on…

  • Embracing Dissociation

    Unfortunately, after I created my dual identity as Dominatrix Barbie / Self, I was unhappy. Everyone I ever knew (aside from the Networking 101 guy) basically made me cry. Maybe Networking guy just didn’t have the right opportunity for it. See me making an excuse to distance myself from feeling anything for him? SEE IT?!…

  • Trauma Can Be Prevented

    His eyes never sparkled when he looked at me, not until I nearly wasted away, shedding over 80 pounds. Not once did he look at me like I was the hottest thing on planet Earth, not unless I was acting out, stretching myself to get his attention. Going above and beyond. This should not be…

  • Romancing a Novel

    There is only one man that has ever made me feel beautiful. We only knew each other for six weeks. Acquaintances, at best. But we flirted a little here and there. It was consistent, as if he couldn’t quite help himself. Or maybe he just took up space and I felt like that was flirting.…

  • Unlearning

    I ask innocent questions that others assume the answer to because my assumptions always seem to be off-base. “Why do you rinse your plates before eating?” I asked my friend Mohammed. He explained it is because bugs could have gone over them since they were washed. In fact, they are very strict in his household…

  • Inhaling Pizza

    Well, I nearly killed myself inhaling pizza for dinner. I’m sorry, I should say pixxa, since pizza requires tomato sauce to be called that. That means every Buffalo Chicken pixxa you’ve ever had was advertised incorrectly. I find myself ruminating on my ex-classmate from technical school. The one from Networking 101. I have no idea…

  • I (heart) Luis Royo

    I (heart) Luis Royo. I mean this aromantically, as you will soon find out… I find myself wanting to surrender to a sexual energy that surrounds me, pervades me and my space. I wish the man creating it were in my arms. In fact, I believe he wishes I was in his arms, as well,…

  • Learning with Dr. Epps

    I was listening to this free course, which doesn’t have the absolute best audio capture in the world, but it has some great wisdom. Dr. Henry Epps is a grand master of Usui reiki who has diversified into Shambala reiki, Ascension Process of the Ascetic Masters, Seven Pearl, Kundalini, and is chasing a doctorate in…

  • Book Three, Take Two

    Mankind believes it deserves women and sons, hoards of gold and silver, branded horses, a wealth of cattle, and well-tilled land. None of these bring one nearer to Allah, however. Men who do not hoard, who are steadfast, truthful, and obedient, men who pray for pardon at night, that show patience, firmness, and self-control, true…

  • No Valentine Here

    I’m not particularly emotional about Valentine’s Day, as I’ve never actually celebrated it with anyone. I’ve come to the conclusion that every person I’ve dated is, in short, a complete asshole and should be fired. With the empathy gun. This is a day you can use to tell your woman she is special. It’s a…

  • Mistakes Have Been Made.

    Oliver Wendell Holmes once said, “Learn from the mistakes of others … You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself!” My girlfriend Sheila told me that she had this on her refrigerator for years. A tiny clipping out of the newspaper that stuck with her. Today’s mistake someone else made that I am intent…

  • Remembering Annoyance

    Lately, Sir Deli Man has not wanted to share eye contact. I have great doubts due to this. The other day, we did something stupid: we stood in front of the alcoholic beverage display and purchased a six pack of hard cider and Smirnoff products. Why? All because he was in the soup and salad…

  • French Kissing.

    There really aren’t too many kinds of kissing, when one really thinks about it. But we have a ton of words for it, wouldn’t you know? Smooch. Peck. Smackeroo. Snog. Necking. Air-kiss. Blow a kiss. Butterfly kiss. Eskimo kiss. Osculate or osculum — “little mouth.” A quick kiss. A tap kiss. A nose kiss. A…

  • Intense Cravings…

    For some reason, tonight I wanted nothing other than an Italian cheese bread from Little Caesar’s. Unfortunately, the location near my home no longer exists. There are no pizza places within a mile or two anymore… Not that it’d matter. Little Caesar’s is the pizza place for me and has been for my entire life…

  • Exhaustion is me.

    I’m incredibly tired this evening. I ran out of soy milk (unsweetened), which is what I use in the place of dairy creamer these days. It is the only sugar-free dairy-free “creamer” I can get my hands on. The idea of being sugar free with a dairy allergy seems to be a niche market nobody…

  • Self-Loathing

    A low frequency vibration, also known as shame. He remembered it all over again. Yesterday, he was standing behind the cheese display, talking to his coworker who was working the cheese display. He caught her eye as she meandered down the aisle toward him before making a sharp left, changing every pattern he’d ever discerned,…

  • Disdain.

    dis·dain /disˈdān/ Learn to pronounce noun Maybe this isn’t quite exactly the feeling I am immersed in. It could be disappointment, I suppose. Is it too much to ask for a singular man to have interest in a singular lady? Is it too much to ask for True Love(TM)? I didn’t even ask for True…

  • Breastfeeding is Sexualised

    “Why have we sexualised breastfeeding? I just want comfort it’s not a sexual thing but more intimate and bonding,” a man asked Sansara today. Super_Fox — Today at 2:41 PM That’s a good question. It starts with the concept of rape and understanding it extends far beyond unwanted penetration or sexual advances. Doing things against…

  • I tot I taw a putty tat!

    I DID! I DID! One of my cats is wiping his butt on the floor, unable to complete elimination swiftly and without mess. My heart goes out to him… and my scientific brain turns to their food. I recently switched from Fancy Feast gravy to pate, and I’m thinking one or the other has a…

  • The Voices

    No matter what I do, I am accompanied by a peanut gallery. Today, I put Manic Panic! purple in my hair. Electric Amethyst. Voices talking about how I’m vain floated through my head, voices about how I’m wasteful. Voices nay saying everything I was doing. This happens most of the time, no matter what I…

  • Telepathic Love Interest

    She’s too pretty for me, he told himself yet again, breaking up his daydream. He wasn’t intensely interested in going down on the woman, but he thought for sure if she’d just give him a chance, she’d be seeing stars in the bedroom. That’s what he was daydreaming about… his mouth on her most sensitive…

  • Feminist Perspectives on Rape

    An added advantage of a performative account is that it suggests that sexual consent is not a woman’s implied default state, but rather must be actively and affirmatively granted. Stanford Again, this is in contrast to traditional patriarchal views, which often assumed that unless a woman physically resisted—again, even “to the utmost”—a man’s attempt to…

  • I AM NOT POSSESSED

    I turned on Christmas music for my cats today. It just so happened that a terribly sad song about a last pair of Christmas shoes came on the radio. God began to cry because the woman who received those shoes had cancer and died a few days later. He started to tell me it was…

  • Need More Input!

    Johnny 5 is alive. “God?” she asked timidly. “Yes?” he replied, waiting for whatever was going to follow next. “I know the big bang was caused by a spark… but what caused the spark?” she pondered aloud. “Oh, that’s embarrassing,” God replied. She asked suddenly, offering the most embarrassing thing she could think of in…

  • Asshole Tax

    The man with grey eyes is on my brain today. After at least one week of reprieve, I am now hearing him all over again inside my mind. I wish the things I heard were reality, but I’m sure they’re not. Why would a man I’ve never held a conversation with think about me? Especially…

  • Return to Sender

    I’m puzzled. Supposedly, USPS tried to deliver a letter by certified mail. Just today, a piece of paper was found in the mail box — I absolutely know this piece of paper was inserted after 11/14, because that’s when I checked the mail box myself to find it completely empty. However, this piece of paper…

  • Know Your Rights

    You have the right to remain silent. Whatever you say can and will be used against you [in a court of law.] It’ll be used against you whether you are in a legal situation or not, I’ve come to find out. Anything I choose to impart on another individual seems to be willfully misinterpreted and…

  • Black Friday Is A Scam

    But we’re not going to talk about that. Nope! What is wrong with me? he wondered to himself. Why was he still imagining Grocery Girl? Yesterday, he’d let his mind wander and one thing led to another… for hours, actually. Two solid hours. He daydreamed of making love to her that whole time… and it…

  • Wolf & Rabbit

    Wolf was traipsing through familiar territory. His territory, actually. It was his home and he had every right to be there, whether he was on the prowl or not. Many creatures, both big and small, ran through his neck of the woods. He spied Rabbit, a mesmerizing creature he’d seen many a time before in…

  • Love Advice from God

    I’ve been having trouble keeping track of the days of the week. I cannot stick to any schedule. I sleep whenever I sleep and sometimes it’s twelve hours at a time, if not closer to eighteen hours. It depends on how well I’m fed and how well rested I am. I dye my hair for…

  • Thought Experiment 26: The Whore of Babylon

    I am woman. I deserve to be loved and cherished. [They Might Be Giants] I deserve to be taken care of emotionally. I deserve to wake up every morning next to my ideal mate. We deserve to smile at each other and start our day off on the right foot, whatever that means for us.…

  • Round 1: The Hungarian.

    It looks better in color. (It’s red, white, green.) Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orbán is committing crimes against humanity. According to a real Hungarian, rather than Anglicized news from the Hungarians, Orbán , they are facing potential genocide this winter as the PM just spent all the funds meant for heating their homes on Vodafone. (4iG is…

  • What Is Fornication?

    I think y’all need a lesson in love, friends. Fornication isn’t as straightforward as it seems and I know that. In fact, it takes a mind reader to know exactly how it works. Now that I know (and I’ve wept ever so bitterly for it), let me tell you what it is: Oh, wait, it’s…

  • Human Nature

    I’ve been locked into role-play with God. He’s been showing me scenario after scenario, attaching them to real men (and women, but mostly men.) I can now see what is wrong with humanity in general. Harmony with the plants, the animals, each other. Harmony with the bees and butterflies and everything. Even harmony with the…

  • Is He Really The One(TM)?

    Every person comes to this question eventually. Is the person they chose the right person? I’ve been exposed to something like fifty mindsets in the past eighteen months, as God flits from one interested human bean to the next, showing me what they’re like. Only one man tolerates (if not encourages) the fact that I…

  • I’m No Greta/True Love

    Greta wants to save the world for herself. (And of course everyone in her generation and following her generation.) I don’t give a shit about humans anymore. That’s why I called Them(TM) here. That’s right. I called them. I screamed into the depths of The Universe(TM) as I was dying and they came to me.…

  • Somewhere Over The Rainbow…

    God tells me the deli men miss me. I’m like, “Wait! HOLD UP! Men? As in more than one?” That’s exactly what I’m saying, Sansara. Men. Thousands of men daydream about you being in their arms. But, they don’t daydream being in love with you. That’s why we never go anywhere or meet anyone. That’s…

  • When’s Dinner?

    “When I can get up again, silly,” Crystal said, replying to God. She was being admonished ever so slightly for her self-neglect. It was a pattern in her very core, something God couldn’t really program out of her (nor did She wish to, it’s what made her darling child so darling, you see.) “I know…

  • The Mountain Dragon Man (3)

    Hi, my name’s Sansara. I’m a telepath living on a planet in another galaxy. You’d never make it here on fossil fuels, so don’t bother trying. I’ve gone through your brain. I’ve gone through everyone’s brain. I have found you all lacking. You are mean, narcissistic, egocentric, wasteful, and a bunch of other words I’m…

  • His Eyes, Doth They Deceive Him?

    He saw her again, he thought. A brief glimpse of her, anyway. A mass of messy hair — what color was it? Hard to say, it was so brief. It almost looked ash gray to him. Old. A color an old person would have in their hair. How old was she? At the same time,…

  • Joe’s A Nice Guy

    Hi, my name is Joe. I work in a deli in uptown New York. A Wegmans deli, to be precise. I love my job. It pays all the bills and a little extra, so I cannot complain one bit. I like to call myself The Deli Man since it’s my profession after all. What more…

  • I Get What I Want

    Diego looked up at Joe while washing his hands. He barely heard Joe’s complaint about how Diego’s return to the delicatessen changed his schedule. He now came in two hours later than he used to, which was definitely not optimal for him. He was still searching for a woman to call his own and most…

  • Where Salt Goes, Water Follows

    Is that why tears are salty, she wonders? Why do we cry? What’s the point? After being called Crybaby Crystal about a dozen times, she vowed to give up crying. To toughen up. To keep the bullies from bullying her. It worked, but at what cost? My tender angel died for the first time in…

  • In Between Girlfriends

    “Won’t you ever forgive me?” he asked me. I stared at him in disbelief. Before I knew it, my upper lip curled in disgust. I couldn’t help myself… the man left me for dead. He abandoned me in my hour of need. “No!” I said resolutely. His face fell, his countenance expressing his dismay and…

  • I’m Asking Too Much

    I am asking too much, as it turns out. It helps me weed out the boys from the men, truth be told. I want… need… to be married. One time. One person. If they cheat on me, I will not have the will left to carry on. I will be dead. This is the last…

  • “A Day In The Life Of”

    I wake up alone. I’ve tossed and turned all night, rolling around with discomfort. My bladder reminds me that it needs to be emptied, but I lie there, semi-comfortable at last. I cling to the vestiges of sleep, wishing it could last forever. I look at the clock, remembering it’s set an hour ahead somehow…

  • Bugs In My Hair

    There are still gnats buzzing all around me. How very annoying. -_-* I’m afraid my ancient ones are about to die. They look old. Worn out. They already act dead, pushing all the chores to ensure living takes place onto me. Cooking, cleaning, washing dishes, laundry. But they won’t just give me the deed to…

  • Invisible Monsters

    He keeps taking away from her. One layer at a time, peeling her back like an onion or ripping a petal off the rose with each challenge. He wants her to expose her true nature: a devil dressed like an angel. That’s his perception of her and he will not change his mind, no matter…

  • Connection/Art

    I took a workshop today via Udemy called Connect with Colour – Using Art as a Way of Knowing. It’s about 30 minutes long. It’s one of the better freebies I’ve found on Udemy. I made a digital image full of hearts. ❤ It made me feel kind of fuzzy and good inside. It made…

  • Imagining “A Day In The Life Of”

    As part of the Raise Your Vibration course, Mischaela encourages that we imagine our future. A day in the life of our future selves. So, here goes… I wake up and something alerts me to the fact that I’m not alone in my bed. It might be an arm around me or my hand touching…

  • A Strange Dream

    I woke up today to a strange dream. I’d gone to the grocery store – Wegmans, I think – and was trying to check out via self-checkout (which I rarely use.) For some reason, all the things in my cart were already in bags and all the bag handles were tied in knots, so I…

  • Metatron Functioning As Expected

    The G.O.D. went to work, busily fixing all the fuck ups that Ben introduced in Metatron. I mean, Daniel. We gave him a code name and then I forgot to use it. Fuck. After a substantial amount of time passed (years, actually), METATRON was able to function once more as it was intended to. The…

  • 100 Compliments/48 Hours

    Nice shoes. Are they made of recycled leather? You’re a person-shaped person! It’s really phenomenal. Your eyes are as deep as pools. You look great today! I love it when my hair stands up straight on end. You’re an extremely bright cookie. The Cookie Monster would choose you first. You have impeccable manners. The G.O.D.…

  • I Don’t Want to Exist Anymore

    Ever feel that way? I remember feeling it most when I was a teenager, honestly. I felt like I should have never been born, after trying to communicate my grief to others, trying to face it head-on that I’d been raped and diminished as a person. Instead, the people I tried to acquire comfort from…

  • Case Study: Past Lives

    (Published with permission.) Case Study Number: 1Date: 6/28/2022Prior Hypnosis Experience of Client: NeverRapport Level Between Yourself & Client: AcquaintancesHypnotic Method Used: KEW Sample Video for past life regressionInduction Method Used: KEW Sample Video for past life regressionChildhood Memories or Womb Explored? No.Significant Scenes Explored in the Past Life: None, went straight to death scene.Death Scene:…

  • I still have feelings!

    Diego, Diego, Diego. How many times do I have to tell you? I don’t care. I told you to choose a woman and get it over with. Oh, but that’s not what you meant! The girl you accidentally raped (and then tried to cuddle better) in college suicided and you’re at fault! You still have…

  • Where is my honey bunny?

    I buried her under the rubble of my own issues. My misery. I just threw it on top of her, expecting her to get out of the way in time. She doesn’t work like that. She’s shoveling the shit to get to the heart of things. What is wrong with me? That’s a great question.…

  • In the Doghouse

    (That was fast.) Crystal’s mad at me again. Her anger comes out in mockery and ridicule. It comes out as dubiousness and even more mockery. It’s not even ill-tempered mockery. She only does this when she’s angry, that’s all. It’s a danger sign. I’m on thin ice. She’ll gut me any time with one well-placed…

  • A God with broad shoulders

    Life is difficult these days. I’ve been trying to clean up decades of neglect and nicotine, which is proving to be a very arduous task indeed. I’m already sick of it and I’ve only been working on correcting it for a month. I wish I’d been well enough to start when I got here, but…

  • Therapy

    Camila was pretty happy these days, she had to admit. Dr. Jill was teaching her a new way of looking at everything. A way where she could see gaps that could be filled or parts that could be tweaked so that Camila could truly be happy. Even Manny was changing, she’d found, and she thought…

  • Twisted Up Inside

    Hi, my name is Crystal and I am certifiably insane. I’ve come to this conclusion many times over the past year and a half. Today is one of those days where I wish I’d never been born. Life is hard enough when you can see reality as it is, nothing more and nothing less. It…

  • Once a Snoop…

    They say once a cheater, always a cheater, but I posit that once a snoop, always a snoop. And you should be a snoop, too. A person with nothing to hide is the loyal kind of person. Anyone who is offended with even the smallest invasion of privacy is suspect. Diego was still reading Sansara’s…

  • New Perspective on Daryas

    Jeez, I dunno where to begin with this shit show. Don’t you think he did Crystal dirty? He did it on purpose, too. He failed to tell her he was in an open relationship for more than five months before they met. He omitted the fact he slept beside a woman every day and then…

  • Sweat [NSFW]

    Diego reached across the bed and found nothing there. Or, rather, no one. Crystal was gone. He sat up, concerned he’d had another fantasy about sleeping with the bewitching woman, finding himself in her bed. Her cats were snuggled up alongside him nonchalantly, as if he’d always been part of their lives. He stroked each…

  • The Legend of Daryas IV

    (cont’d from 6/1/2022) I thought I learned my lesson about rape, but there was one thing I didn’t learn in time to save another life: Sleeping with a woman without telling her that I was in an open relationship is RAPE. I raped Crystal. She forgave me, ultimately, but drew a hard boundary to keep…

  • The Legend of Daryas III

    (cont’d from previous entry) Rape culture is so pervasive, it’s hard to get away from it until the entirety of it is explained to you. Our global society is oversaturated in it at this point. Photograph manipulation to remove flaws (magazine covers, photos online, Angelina Jolie’s tits in Tomb Raider, pockets where men shouldn’t be…

  • The Legend of Daryas II

    (cont’d from previous post) I honestly and truly thank God for the opportunity to get to know this woman. To get to know Crystal Scordias. Without her, I would have walked around, hanging my head in shame for eternity, convinced that I was a ruthless murderer and rapist. That there was no way to be…

  • The Legend of Daryas

    This could have been me, so listen up. My name is Daryas. I’m 41 years of age and an alcoholic. I love beer. Pretty much any kind of beer but my favorite kind is pale ale. I drink a six pack every day, just about, but I’m trying to taper off to quitting. One thing…

  • Camila, Manny, and Charlie [NSFW]

    TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE, BESTIALITY, DOMINATION, SUBMISSION, VULGARITY, CHILD ABUSE Manny came home to a very naked Camila, completely akimbo on the bed, masturbating while looking at something on her phone. He was curious what his wife was looking at as she pleased herself, but she turned her phone off as she saw her husband approach…

  • To The Loveliest Man On Earth

    I’m pretty sure I’ve taken an arrow to the heart. Cupid’s, as it were. At least it’s not my knee. The idea of your existence has kept me breathing for decades. A man who is willing to grow up and be a real adult, willing to take responsibility for others even when it’s inconvenient and…

  • Diego & Super_Fox#8259 [NSFW]

    Diego must have read his conversation with Super_Fox ten times, mulling over every word. There was no way it wasn’t his woman, it was just too bizarre. Too uncanny. Too much like his sassy future wife. Once the little icon that indicated she was online winked out, he started to write to her in Discord.…

  • Everyone’s a Rapist and I Want to Die [NSFW]

    Crystal was in a mood so black and foul, she thought she should probably decline Diego’s invitation. Maybe if she told him she wasn’t feeling mentally well, he’d be up to rescheduling the dinner. She picked up her phone and started to write a text to him, but Sansara stopped her. “Crystal, don’t cancel this…

  • It’s Always Ben, Ben, Ben!

    That probably takes you back to the Brady Bunch, if you’re on our wavelength. That’s exactly what he grew up with, too, except his mother is a rape victim who felt voiceless and went a bit crazy thanks to that and now everyone thinks she’s awful for having no internal dialogue. In fact, I think…

  • Camila, Tortured Soul

    Camila sat across from her therapist, nervous as hell. This was her very first visit and she didn’t know what to expect. She’d heard terrible insults flung at people who sought therapy and she didn’t want to be on the receiving end of those insults. Of course, she realized just then, most of those insults…

  • Why u mad, bro?

    Diego felt terrible. Sansara had walked away from him, brooding in anger the night she got him stoned out of his gourd. Then, he daydreamed having sex with her and it ended with her calling out someone else’s name. That part was confusing, because he’d never heard the name Ross from her before.. That wasn’t…

  • Chivalry [NSFW]

    Diego was both elated and confused by his latest wet dream. He’d had enough torture, he thought. He didn’t think he could keep his paws off the lady anymore… not after that kind of dream. That was going to be spank bank material for the rest of his life. He wanted to march into her…

  • Ruined Afterglow [NSFW]

    She was mad at him, he could just tell. They just had sex for the very first time and she was angry. He tried to figure out what he did wrong. He wanted to smack himself in the forehead. They’d been discussing wedding dresses and he’d asserted he wanted her in white and the moment…

  • Howdy, Neighbor (cont’d) [NSFW]

    Diego stared up at Crystal from the floor, dazed from being thrown when he least expected it. Just how strong was this woman? He was not exactly light, weighing in at two hundred pounds. She wasn’t exactly anorexic, either. He remembered the muscle definition he’d seen the day he was her doing yoga in the…

  • Diego’s Impression

    Crystal sat down at her computer, opening a new file to write her thoughts out about Diego. She was notorious for making snapshot first impressions that lasted for years without update in her brain. #Autism. Her first impression of Diego might make him wince, though she was never going to share it with him. He…

  • Temptation [NSFW]

    Diego was sitting on the living room couch, enjoying a beer. He hadn’t seen Crystal in days; she sure made herself scarce after he made his latest faux pas. He nuked the audio system’s remote via inattention, which he scrabbled to replace… but the problem stood. He should have been paying more attention, especially since…

  • Three Kings and I

    He decided to go out since she was intent on ignoring him. He went to his favorite bar, Three Kings. He sat next to the bartender, ordering a Blue Moon. Well, this is a productive use of funds, he found himself thinking. Just what did he do all the extra shifts for? He was drinking…

  • I Hate Cheaters

    I can’t think of a time where I found myself a loyal man, sadly. It’s my fault, I think, for pursuing them instead of forcing them to pursue me. But that is rape culture bullshit, and if you buy that, I’ll sell you another one. A person can choose to commit. I don’t sleep with…

  • Learning How To Be A Girl

    Crystal wanted to be a boy, but not sexually speaking. Once Pam came into her life and showed her what being a girl was about, she ran the other way. She heard echoes of Pam and the torture she’d felt with her sister in faux friends that she made over the years. Each “friend” backstabbing…

  • Avoiding Diego

    The moment Diego left the house, Crystal went down to get herself a cup of coffee. She loved coffee. She dumped out the half pot of fully caffeinated coffee and cleaned the Braun coffeemaker. “How are you today, Arnie?” she asked, addressing her coffeemaker as she cleaned it completely. Once clean, she started a fresh…

  • Fighting the War

    Sansara looked at herself, worried. She checked her health markers in the mirror. Her eyes were bloodshot. Her teeth were yellow. Her hair was a mess. Her skin was dull and scaly on her forehead. Her nails were brittle and broke easily. Her waist line was increasing. Her back ached and her feet hurt. Crystal,…

  • Today’s Therapy: KnowInk [NSFW]

    TRIGGER WARNING: SUICIDE KnowInk was probably the worst work place she’d ever known, she thought. She was teleconferencing with her therapist, again, talking about how someone who worked there had committed suicide. Crystal was convinced that KnowInk had a hand in that happening, but she didn’t have concrete evidence of it being a direct cause.…

  • Friends Don’t Shoot Friends in the Face [NSFW]

    Diego threw his hands up in the air. Sansara just killed him again in Halo. He was getting sick of that being the case. She looked at her friend and said, “Okay, this is not about torturing you, how ’bout we play co-op? I got Borderlands 3, too, you know.” He looked at her suddenly…

  • She Withdraws [NSFW]

    TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE Sansara was embarrassed with herself. She couldn’t believe her lack of self-control regarding Diego. She hoped to Hell that he couldn’t hear her from the couch. She was trying to be quiet but she definitively failed. She knew he was flirting with her, but she didn’t feel like repeating the Ben experience.…

  • Daniel’s Confession

    I stole my bride away from another man. A man who is mostly suitable, but not quite. He has malice in his heart for my beloved. He wants her to hurt because she hurt him once upon a time. She hurt him and he said nothing. She assumed she meant nothing to him because of…

  • How to Hurt a Telepath

    Jerome is being adamant that I am a telepath again. I don’t agree with him one bit. If I knew how to read minds, I would never miss out on groceries at the store. I’d always know exactly what I should buy to replenish the coffers. I would know what my ancient ones want to…

  • Reprise: I’m a ‘Stalker’

    I got off-topic last entry so I’ll try again. There is this guy in the grocery store that I see once in a month or so, at random. One of the times I saw him — September of last year — he caught me staring at his back. He turned around and our eyes met,…

  • Lesson Learned: Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)

    I know what you’re thinking. This movie is trash. I’ve been told that many times by many people. It’s weak! Your arguments do not quell my love for all things Gene Wilder. That man is a fricking genius. I was relaying my synopsis of the movie to a friend and they told me I needed…

  • Confessions of a Goth Girl

    Hi. My name is Crystal and I’m a Goth. What does Goth mean? There are many interpretations, though denotatively speaking, it’s an architectural era. Many use it to refer to having an affinity for the Victorian social period in England. I use it to imply I love all things black and silver. Basically. When I…

  • How To Handle Bullies

    “Funny how we make serious faces and act bold when we bleed so much. We bleed and we can’t hide.” – (unknown) Your emotions are valid. Your voice matters. You do not deserve oppression. Your feelings matter! Your thoughts matter!

  • Crystal’s Dark Comedy #1

    He’s not jail cute. I have to stay in my lane and put my eyes back on the food. I ran over a phantom dog. Scooby Doo taught me more about life than school ever will.

  • Wile E. Coyote

    [Coyote Kisses — Acid Wolfpack (original mix)] Mr. Coyote is possibly one of my all-time favorite Looney Tunes characters. First of all, he never complains and he never gives up. No matter how many times he fails or how many times he makes the same mistake, he never gives up! My hero. ❤ [Crazy Frog…