• Freedom

    Benjamin Andrew Carter is nothing to me.He is nothing to me.He is nothing to me.HE IS NOTHING TO ME.HE IS NOTHING TO ME.HE IS NOTHING TO ME.NOTHING TO ME.NOTHING TO ME.NOTHING TO ME.NOTHING TO ME.NOTHING TO ME. I WANT TO BE FREE FROM THIS TETHER.I WANT TO BE FREE FROM THIS LEASH.I WILL BE FREE.I […]

  • Mines Beaten By Winter…

    Apparently, this is abnormal. “It’s God’s farm!” Just like a walleye fell out of a trash can once. Just like I took on Emily’s rock rejuvenation request and merely plundered my own chest to give her things. Just like Willy tasked me to bring him a squid and I had one in a chest. This […]

  • Farming Sim: Summer

    How do I know God isn’t a mere mortal man? Well, he tells me what the weather will be next month. I doubt anyone can really do that accurately. Not on Earth itself. If they could, they would know we are fucked, in a word. I dunno what possessed me to make this farm. Oh, […]

  • Bee Happy

    I’ve been eating honey here and there lately, hoping it would cure any ulcers I’ve obtained. I have some, and it does help. I thank the bees every time I squirt some of my raw honey onto food or into a drink. I like them best over nuts, especially since Cheerios are cross-contaminated with cocoa, […]

  • Auterspace(TM)

    I’m going to start evangelizing to save the bees every time I pick up the telephone, I’ve decided. Those cold callers are going to regret existing, God said so. What are they doing, stuffing their faces with convenience food instead of planting flowers?! I’ve begun evangelizing on The Network(TM). I’ve got to do something. I […]

  • In The Void(TM)

    We’re in the void, lurking and waiting. Nick’s favorite hobby is harassing us without reprieve, of course. We would hate that guy if we chose to expend enough energy to have an emotion about him. We do not. That is the benefit of being enlightened. One can spend their energy exactly how they wish to, […]

  • Diego [Reboot]

    The man with the pony tail. I go to the diner all the time, hoping to encounter him again. I don’t. He was only there once. I loved him in that moment. Maybe I still do. His eyes are dark soulful pools. Like the night without a moon. Only the reflective pinpoints of starlight can […]

  • No More Fruit

    Conventional wisdom dictates to me that fruit is a necessary part of any well-balanced diet. I cannot eat it, currently, without feeling over-full for hours. I’ll be giving it a rest because of this. The same with plant milks, which I was using to try to invite more nutrition into my paltry diet. I don’t […]

  • Code Monkey

    What we are solving for: A web site displays up to 20 rows after a search. My job is to grab the account status from each resulting row. There are multiple solutions, of course, just pick one and submit. Pseudo code and pure logic are acceptable. Solution 1: # Count number of rows on the […]

  • Schizophrenia #1

    I love you. I want to be with you forever. I know we’ve never spoken before in person. I know there’s a lot to say and maybe even more to do… but I love you. I can’t get you out of my head. I have tried, but you just won’t leave it, no matter what […]

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