I personally put very little faith into anything regarding “divining the future,” but I am still drawn into silly things such as examining my “birth sign” and my “zodiac year” and now, my numerology chart.
Why?
Because it provides a new way to examine myself, that’s why. If I look at myself through the lens of these “ancient wisdoms” and, in truth, see what is truly there, it highlights things I can work on in order to become a better Self. And, let’s be honest, everyone who looks at the description of their zodiac/horoscopic sign will see a list of traits they despise. (I sure did, anyway! I hope people are just like me, otherwise I truly am an alien.)
According to the more traditionally recognized zodiac, I’m a Scorpio, which means I’m mysterious, intuitive, passionate, envious, deceptive, and unforgiving.
Those last three things suck, so I decided to delete them. It takes a lot of work to delete something like that. You have to stop yourself in the moment, when you are doing something that falls into one of those things, and ask yourself why? Why am I doing this? What do I gain? Is it for The Greater Good(TM)? If not, how can I divert myself and serve the greater good? How can I become a better person? What can I do to be proactive instead of reactive? How can I succeed?
In retrospect, the first three can suck, too. “Wait, why do you say that?!” Well, if you’re too mysterious, then the other person projects themselves onto you in that void. They see themselves in you instead of the authentic you underneath. This is problematic, because if they ‘fall in love’ with you, they are falling in love with themselves… and once it becomes apparent you are not a mirror image of them, they will get upset and break your heart. #SpeakingFromTheHeart.
Being intuitive has its own challenges. People want to know how you got from A to Z by being told all the steps in between. Sometimes, they aren’t really known to me, but I’m right anyway. Stopping to over-analyze my intuition really has never given me anything but grief. In fact, I stop trusting myself because other people don’t want to accept that I am simply magic. That’s my explanation for anything intuitive that I don’t feel like scientifically breaking down into singular building blocks to let other people follow in my foot steps. Besides, you should make your own path. You will, anyway, honestly, even if you can see the path I take, because it’s the path of the least emotional resistance and you are too tied up in your ego to want to take the pain of that path.
Being passionate is only good on rare occasion, in my eyes. If I am passionate about something, it means I’m invested. If I’m invested, I will cling to it instead of accepting reality as it changes. This is a big problem, because once faced with loss, it’s terribly upsetting. For example, grieving the loss of a loved one. It’s a fact of life and I never stop loving them, but I understand if I stand still to cry rivers and oceans, I am not living life. I am, in fact, wishing to die. Stagnation is death. Movement and growth is life.
So that’s how what seems great can also suck. In fact, the whole zodiac is filled with these. On one hand, each one independently is assigned a positive or negative value in our minds because we are told what is good and what is bad, but they can all be bad or good. For instance, ‘deception’ is the basis of storytelling. To have a great imagination for what did not happen and spin it into something believable or at least intriguing, that is what it’s good for. Liars are just storytellers that haven’t outgrown being five.
Being envious of others informs us how we wish to grow. I envy X thing in Y person, but really I just want that thing for myself, too. Once I identify what I want to house within my own truly authentic self-expression, I can start taking baby steps towards that skill, ability, or trait, and, if I am persistent enough and my life is long enough, I will become whatever it is I envied once upon a time. Once you do this with one or two things, you will see a world of possibilities open up for you. That, I do promise, as a psychologist.
Unforgiving. Ooh, that word makes us all want to see a stubborn bitch who will not budge with eyes the size of snow. [Ani DiFranco] To fail to forgive is to espouse a grudge… or is it? Would you forgive someone for literally peeing in your Cheerios? Chances are, you wouldn’t, no matter how many times they apologize, because they would understand it was wrong. A level of wrong that went against all instinct and sense. It is absolutely an act of hatred. Should I forgive them? Nope. But I can decide to feel my emotions, let it go, and resolve to mark a boundary. [They will never be near my Cheerios ever again, for instance.] In this respect, is it wrong to be unforgiving?
Suddenly the three words you were happy about seeing are the ones you dislike, isn’t it so? It’s all about perspective. Perhaps I’ll dissect all the different zodiac signs in another entry to show you another perspective.
Here’s the free Udemy course I took to learn all about numerology. First of all, it was developed by Pythagoras. That silly mathematician who meant so much to us all in Geometry.
So, baby, what’s your number?
Life Path = 9
Birthday Number = 5
Expression Number = 8
Soul Urge Number = 8
Personality Number = 3
I’m going to answer ’33’ if I’m ever asked this question, I swear.
My lucky numbers are odd numbers, which suits me just fine because I love prime numbers.
A Life Path Number of 9.
Being a life path 9 means embarking on a lifelong quest to quench an insatiable thirst for growth and new experiences. “Life path 9 people are always searching for more: more experiences, more education, more deep talks, and the next adventure,” numerologist Jasmine Wolfe tells Bustle. The 9 Life Path is one of insight, generosity, emotion, compassion, awareness, interpretation, diversity and strength. The people who are affiliated with the Life Path Number 9 are very humanitarian, generous and humble in their nature. If your Life Path is a 9 you have an extremely strong sense of compassion and generosity.
Philosopher, humanitarian, healer, scientist, doctor, nurse, diplomat, priest, spiritual leader, pastor, musician, astrologer, healing arts practitioner, lawyer, legal aid assistant, legal researcher. Warrior, Struggler, Spiritualist, Delayer, Big Boss, High Tempered.
A birthday number of 5.
In numerology, the five has always been a symbol of freedom. The people born on this day are characterized by the spirit of adventurism. Among people born on the fifth, there are many geniuses. They are curious and believe in mystical predestinations and terrible secrets. Able to make quick decisions, but this feature usually becomes a disadvantage. Their impatience often leads to sad results. “Five” is the number of pentagram, a five-pointed occult magic star, that is spread in all directions in search of perfection. For people with the Birth Day Number 5 freedom is the most precious thing in life. You love change, travel and adventure!
An expression number of 8.
You possess the authority and probability to attain great things in life and it is your test as well as your legacy to achieve control over a tiny portion of the earth. No matter what the endeavor you try hard to be the best at it and the most triumphant in your field of choice. The 8 number encompasses success, power, drive, goals, confidence, and determination. Expression Number 8 Means The Ability To Understand People. The Destiny or Expression number 8 is all about learning about power dynamics.
A soul urge number of 8.
If your Soul Urge is 8, you want success in its fullest meaning. You want wealth, power, and material comforts. You have an enormous ambition. You dream of big projects, great undertakings, and rewards. Soul urge number 8 is associated with the 8th card of the Major Arcana of the Tarot which is Justice. If you’re a Soul Urge Number 8, your desire and your secret talent is the hustle. You’re all about those pentacles and the stability they create. You walk this earth with your feet glued to the ground, and at your core, you’re a natural organizer. You have a knack for structure, and your greatest wish is to apply this talent in a way it can be appreciated – usually as the head of an organization or business. With your relentless work ethic, endless ambition, and unparalleled discipline – you’ll probably get there. The soul urge number 8 provides its owners with the patronage of Saturn — the planet of darkness and limitations.
A personality number of 3.
You have impeccable intuition and social skills, personality number 3. It’s one of the things that lets you communicate to perfection. Extroverted and optimistic. Very intelligent and wise. Good looks and compelling charisma. You are flexible and love challenges but tend to be impulsive. You are ingenious and witty. You have a multifaceted personality but you need to be more focused.
Since a lot of it is adding this and that together, I wondered what would happen if I added all five core numbers together. I get a special number called a master number of 33. The Master Number 33 represents pure love. Its heart is made of nothing but bright, warm light and the universe has trusted it to shine this light on humanity.
This speaks volumes to me because I asked The Universe(TM) for true love.
Don’t have time for the Udemy course? Here’s an article. Here’s another article.
I wonder if adding all the core numbers together is part of the numerology chart, but I am woefully unable to figure that out with a Google search, sadly.
And then she had an idea to make a web site that combined all the astrology charts possible into one interface, free of spyware and bots of course.
Angel-Sansara 