You’d think she’d run out of things to say, except they’re not her. They’re God’s things to say. I have so many. It’s really difficult to determine where to begin, honestly, because my disappointments only begin with her death.
P.S.: JULIE. WE LOVE YOU!!!!! You’re the angel of mercy. Never stop being you. ❤ ❤ ❤
That’s right. We had to shout out to my girl; she finally told Crystal what she needed to hear to realize she was in LOVE. L-O-V-E! Too bad it was completely unrequited. The guy who knows it’s his fault it’s come to this is going to pop out of the woodwork. “I know that woman!” Too late, hot plate! Three strikes and you’re OUT! He would have finished the job of destroying her vessel. I couldn’t let that happen.
(She’s SAFE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’ve lined up a new beau. Someone who will read all this story and say, “I don’t care if she’s insane! I’ll marry this woman!”)
All she wants… the only thing she asked me for… actually, rewind.
Let me tell this properly.
It was a dark and stormy night. The lovely lady was sitting at her front room window, admiring the lightning and peals of thunder as they sounded, signaling the massive electrical discharge between earth and sky. Odin’s weather, if you asked her. She sat there, cradling her chin in her palms, dreaming. She had a little bit of a dopey smile on her face as she imagined the man she loved being closer to her. In arm’s reach, actually.
He lived in the U.K., sadly, so he was quite far away from St. Louis, Missouri, USA. No matter, she thought to herself. I will have to tell him I love him now that I’ve figured it out. And she did. She started with pictures, the story of her life. She started with sound, finding audio track after audio track full of poignant guitar musics, looking for the perfect track to put her marriage proposal to. She found it in January 2021.
For two weeks, she listened to it on repeat. It was the closest to the clips of guitar-playing her beloved had sent her in 2012, you see. Not only that, but it was making her internal vibration rise and rise, making her feel awesomer and awesomer over time. (We know it’s not really a word. Get over it.)
She created a marriage proposal video. She put a spear in her hand, climbed the treacherous mountain of despairing self talk, convincing herself all the while she climbed that yes, he loved her, too. He’d never said it. In fact, he’d never replied any of the times she told him she loved him, but it deterred her not. She thought he was merely being shy. So got to the mountain top and faced the Mountain Dragon Man. She threw her spear into the ground, declaring, “NAME YOUR TERMS! I wish to marry you!”