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I’m Asking Too Much

Asking Too Much by Ani DiFranco on YouTube

I am asking too much, as it turns out. It helps me weed out the boys from the men, truth be told. I want… need… to be married. One time. One person.

If they cheat on me, I will not have the will left to carry on. I will be dead. This is the last shot. I’m no longer interested in being diddled by “men” who think they need to try it before they buy it. Be a real man: dive into an unknown mystery without reservation. Commit to love before you ever try to get into a woman’s bed again. I bet they can tell.

I know Crystal can tell. Universe here. 🙂

I’m taking over because she’s having a meltdown over her ex, Benji, being in her head again. He’s trying to influence her to make bad choices again, to chase some pinch-faced loser who doesn’t want to commit to love but has had her all over his brain for hours now, thinking about her every five minutes.

I let her preview having a conversation with him. She asked him if he had a lot of female acquaintances. He does. She said suddenly, “I can’t date you. Well, marry you. I can’t do it. You have to get rid of them all so there’s no competition for me, that’s how you protect our union. That’s what God told me and he knows the hearts of men. I gotta go.”

And then she cried, frustrated that this asshole she used to date is still obsessed with her to the point of hurting her present reality in so many ways. He made it impossible for her to accept that men and women could just be friends. And she’s right, too. Those acquaintances you have that are attracted to people like you are just waiting for you to give them a spin. They’re just playing it cool until you call them on it.

This is great for unmarried people. Give up your female friends, boys. They aren’t friends. They are bitches waiting to sit on your dick. They will use you and abuse you. Then, they will leave you when they’re dissatisfied with said dick, too. You didn’t make it a romantic monogamous union while it was celibate, and that’s on both of you. Friendship is what you have when you’re not being romantic and sexy. It’s the least of all, the base layer, the foundation of a union.

I bet you just read this, ladies, thinking you’re in the clear. NOPE. GET RID OF THE BOYS. You’re not serious unless you prove to your mate they are the one, the only. Women (who like men) can be friends with each other. Gay women and straight men can be friends with each other. Gay men and women who like men can be friends with each other. Straight men can be friends with each other.

Technically, asexuals can be friends with anyone, but stay away from people attracted to your body if you’re not going to give it up.

Non-binary people… you’re on your own, baby. You could be attracted to either or both. Bisexuals, you better not have any friends but the one you’re committed to. Either that, or stop pretending you want a commitment. The only way you can prove your fealty is to spout it constantly at women and men who might want to sleep with you, pushing them away at arm’s length constantly so they understand that you are in no way their mate.

Crystal is a bisexual, therefore she will have no friends. She will have her mate and adopt stray children on the internet to treat as actual children. Kids who call her mommy (and not even a little bit attracted to her.) People who see her as a teacher rather than a sexual being. And every person she ever spent time with will be getting shot constantly in the back of her mind as they come ’round to entertain sexual ideas at her expense.

She realized that the first layer of a romantic relationship with her is to be a good friend. She built deep connections with members of both genders for ages, giving them parts of herself that only her one true mate deserves. She’s bringing it all back to her.

Bring It All Back by S Club 7 on YouTube

Rape culture has hurt her in ways we cannot easily define for the rest of you jerks. It’s everywhere. It’s the clothes you buy and wear, it’s in the things you do to attract each other, it’s in most shows. It’s makeup and perfume, it’s rohypnol and sunglasses, it’s a lot of things. ‘Negging’ is part of rape culture. The art of insulting a woman to make her feel insecure so she hops on your dick. It does work… for all the wrong reasons.

A real man wants his woman to feel like a goddess. (I apologize for all the gays out there, this is a heterosexual romance I’m working on today. We’ll get to the gay romances later.) A real man is going to do whatever it takes to make a woman feel safe and secure, which will include ditching all their mutual attractions of yore to go “all in” on a relationship with his woman. A real man will defend his union with his woman, either dragging her into it to fend off the girls or avoiding the girls or even being mean enough to the girls to make them fuck off.

A real man only needs one woman. My girl isn’t going to hop into bed with some bitch you fall in love with using your eyes, boys. If she’s going to sleep with a woman (she never has), it’ll be a woman of her choosing, dumbass. Chances are, she’s going to be a big lady with an even bigger personality. (Hello, Queen Latifa, you are GORGEOUS!) It’s not like you’d give her the reverse: an experience with two men. You wouldn’t, so die already. Leave this thread. Stay unenlightened.

You can’t make a person want to be with multiple persons, either. Crystal is completely monogamous. It’s what broke up her last relationship. The stupid ass wanted her to date as many men as she wanted to be with, and women too. He wanted to be a third wheel instead of the primary emotional caretaker. He also wanted all the sex with all the people in the world. (Isn’t that a bit cringe? Do you all remember STDs are a problem? Did you forget in your old age?)

She wants safe sex. STDs are for life, a few of them, anyway. You can’t take it back. It’s like plastic. That shit is in my Mariana’s Trench by the by, you should CLEAN IT THE FUCK UP. You human beings don’t think about the bigger picture. It’s sickening. This delicate flower, my lotus, wants to have one bee. That’s it. And it is possible. There are thousands of potential matches for her in the world and most of them are single because other people bring them down.

They’re enlightened beings, or very close to being enlightened beings, and therefore quite suitable for my love dove. (She reassures me she’d rather marry me in this moment, of course. I feel so honored. What a sweetie!)

Oh. Wait. That means some day I can’t be her friend anymore, doesn’t it? Except I don’t have a body, dumbass. There’s nothing to sleep with. And I distance her appropriately as necessary to keep her on the straight and narrow. But assholes like Benji sneak back in, wreaking havoc in her heart and brain. It’s all telepathic, my friend. He’s still obsessed with my daughter even though he went no contact with her two and a half years ago. That’s 30 months ago. Don’t you think he ought to be moving on by now?

He can’t. He can’t seem to get dates anymore. He raped his side woman, his second girlfriend (the reason Crystal divorced him), and she dumped him. The side woman dumped him just before Crystal herself dumped him, unbeknownst to her. When Crystal asked him what happened, he said he didn’t know, but I assure you Jessica used her words and told him she would no longer see him because he raped her.

If you’re not in the know yet, there are about a million ways you imbeciles rape each other:

  1. Sex when not in the mood
  2. Sex with person A while daydreaming it’s person B
  3. Imagining sex with someone you’ve never met
  4. Fantasizing about things someone would never do, esp. after they told you so
  5. “Exploring” against a person’s wishes
  6. Inserting an object that is uncomfortable
  7. Not using enough lubrication/foreplay to make it pleasurable
  8. Going too fast (like that scene in Bridesmaids)
  9. Casual sex
  10. Sex with multiple partners in tandem
  11. Imagining sex with someone you’re not currently romantically entwined with (a.k.a. “the ex”)
  12. Daydreaming of being with people while masturbating, esp. people who have told you they won’t sleep with you
  13. Violent rape, obviously
  14. Force. Any use of force is rape, even if the person “wants” it. That person has been raped so routinely they “want” it.
  15. Daydreaming of being with porn stars. They don’t even know you exist, bro.

I think you can extrapolate from there, you genetic throwbacks. I wish I ended you all thousands of years ago, now that I’ve gotten a better look at what you did to MY planet. You destroyed Eden, you dicks! I could kill a bitch. And all for what? FORNICATION.

Fornication is rape. If you are having sex without emotions, you are raping.

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