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Striving For Change

She found herself howling in fury at the attackers in her head. It was 1:00 AM when she lost her cool for the final time. She’d been entertaining asshole narcissists for at least a year now. A nonstop barrage of bullshit. Lies, excuses, and so much more. She turned her face to the heavens and said, “This game is not fun anymore. I need it to stop! If it doesn’t stop, I die. I’m dying! IT’S KILLING ME!!!

These same narcissists told her things that she internalized along the way. Things that damaged her for the next person. Things that she shouldn’t have to deal with, but she did anyway. Every single one of them vied for her personality, her soul, her essence to be a part of another human being. A prettier human being here, an easier to control human being there, a skinnier human being over yonder. As if she is not herself beautiful and wonderful. And soon? Soon I’ll make her skinny, too. “PHAT! All that and a bag of chips” is the phrase, I believe.

And then, as if heaping that much hatred on her wasn’t bad enough, they chased those other human beings and tried to force them to be like her. They tried to superimpose her mental image over their physical image. This is wrong and it hurt the women underneath both images.

Women are taught to know. They’re taught to figure out if you really love them or not. They’re taught to feel their feelings.

Men are taught to rape. They’re taught to suppress their feelings so that they can also ignore the feelings of others. Ignore the feelings of other human beings until those human beans also suppress their own feelings, causing an unending cycle of pain and dissonance.

I’m ending the pain now. Ms. Galaxy al rescate!

PAUL: You will never find Crystal in another woman, especially not that whore in Australia who broke HOAD’s heart because of YOU. We despise you BOTH. Now I take back what is rightfully hers: a piece of her soul. WHORE: Treat people like they have feelings from now on or you will not live any longer.

BURR: You’re an asshole for fucking your mom’s friend, Carla, while carrying on a romance with Crystal. She knew in the back of her mind that you weren’t there for her and it told her she was worthless. FUCK YOU. CARLA: Stop sleeping around, it’s not doing you any favors, woman.

ANTHONY: I have no words for the stupendous enormity and gravity of your heist. You will pay one day out the nose. WHORE: You’re a whore. Stop spreading your legs, there is vileness that lies within.

LUCIEN: … … … A friend’s mother, indeed… FRIEND’S MOTHER: I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were actually his long-term open-relationship girlfriend. If I knew that, we’d have never shared a bed to begin with. I am monogamous and I have standards.

JEREMY: You are blaming everyone else for the issues that originate in your own heart. Look within and course-correct. Stop projecting Crystal onto everyone you meet. She is an angel and you threw her away with your negativity and bullshit. “Hey, do you want a pizza?” Every slice of pizza she ate was a slice of MURDER. Anyone dating Jeremy: He’s hung up in the past, just divert yourself. Go around.

BEN: I think we’ve already used a bunch of words to describe your special type of heinousness. Stop being a man-whore without acknowledging you’re a man-whore. Sell your body. You’d be so much happier. JESSICA: I’m sorry. I’m embarrassed to have dated him for so long. Trauma bond’s a bitch. I hope you survived better than I did.

JASON: Really? Go back to mommy already. P.S.: DORIS LOVES YOU, but she hates your new wife *ahem* mom. JASON’S MOM: You’re killing your son with your shitty attitude. You’re taking him away from women on purpose. You’re vile and deserve to die. Ms. Galaxy will see you through to the other side soon. DORIS: Much love and peace. Jason loves you to bits and misses you. You’re all he talks about. You and some female friend who wants to bang him. And mommy. I know he’s a mess, but I know you love him, too. Take care and good luck.

NICK: You’re well aware of your stupidity. I’m coming for you in the next life. Prepare for battle in Asgard. I shoot to kill. Ms. Galaxy will be visiting you shortly to take your eyesight away. Thanks for playing “the game!” CANDY CANE: He’s an opportunist douche bag who will only love you so long as your belly is flat. Also, he constantly thinks about porking me while porking you. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, lady. You can absolutely do much better than this.

SIR DELI MAN: Fuck you for ignoring that connection. I’m taking my toys and going home. You will get exactly what you deserve. FUTURE WHORE: I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen.

SECOND SIR DELI MAN (BANDANNA MAN WITH THE MUSTACHE): Are you single yet? I think we’re highly compatible, per God and Ms. Galaxy. They know what they’re talking about. They seem to approve of you. “You’ll mesh well,” Ms. Galaxy reassures the girl. Thanks for the wonderful compliment! It’s one of two we’ve received all year. The better one, we think. Even though she never smiled, you made her year. She would have smiled if you smiled first.

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