Tonight’s dinner is lamb chops and mixed veg. Exciting, I know. It’s probably not as appetizing in black & white as in full color, but I enjoyed it.
The only thing that didn’t agree with me in this dinner is the bell pepper in the mixed vegetables. I won’t be buying those again in the future, or I’ll be picking those bits out before I fry them up in a pan.
I was supposed to mow the lawn today. It’s gotten too tall with spring in full swing and all. Unfortunately, the lawnmower is kaput. I’m not really surprised since my ancient ones haven’t used it in over a year. I’m thinking about calling their lawn guy to do it tomorrow because I’m tired of Rick’s work-arounds. I’m sick of never taking responsibility for anything and keeping it clean and well-maintained. I had a Toro lawnmower myself. I know better than to leave gas in it over winter, let alone an entire full blown YEAR!
And yet, he kept pulling the starter over and over again, expecting it to roar to life. This is after he demanded I put gas without any ethanol in it into the thing, of course. The most expensive gas on the planet, might I add. I want to make him buy a new one, but I know he will go on a stupid quest to get it repaired… which is great, until you factor in the part where he makes me take care of it because his vehicle is destroyed.
This is what I get for thinking I could go home and actually rest and recover from nearly dying. It was a huge ordeal just to pack everything completely to begin with…
On to better topics. I sold all my stockpiles of gold star crops in Stardew Valley. Jerome thinks this is hilarious — I tried to name my farm Trial and Error and it didn’t fit, so my farm’s name is “Trial and” and my sprite’s name is “Error.” He says that’s the best part: it’s not the farm that is the error, it’s the ‘human being.’
I don’t know what to do anymore. I am going to move out, which means packing again. I’m so tired of my stuff being in boxes already, yet it is.
I have to put my cats down. I can’t keep up with them and the chores to take care of myself. I’m deeply sad about this conclusion and I am having anxiety about making a phone call to a veterinarian to ask for it… I have kept them alive for 18 years, so they’ve had a good run. It’s impossible to cure their mold problems, it seems, no matter how much medicine I give them for it. Which means there is mold in the house, obviously, but it’s been this way the last three places I’ve lived. What are the odds of finding a place that’s mold-free? Not very good, in my estimation.
Since they are a family unit and have been with each other their entire lives, and with me, if I try to give them up for adoption, they’ll just dream of dying in someone else’s hands. If I put the eldest down, the other two (six months younger) will not take the loss well at all. So, now I have to call someone to ask them for this service. If I am rejected just because I want to be compassionate to all three of them at once, I don’t know what I’ll do.
I discovered today there are sites out there that make clones and replicas of your pets for you. That’s going to be amazing for me because I don’t want to be without my little fur babies. I just don’t see a point in continuing to torture them with my pathetic excuse for animal care.
My heart is very heavy.
I think I will go meditate on that and return tomorrow.
Happy mother’s day to all.